2025

2025

still no video games with animals in them

*chomp* *chomp* *smacks lips* so you be sayin' *chomp* *chomp* *pulls eyeballs down into head and then back out* dat umm *chomp* *chomp* y'all niggas can't digest leafs n shiet?

aryanimals are so based kino so they can't put them in wokeslop

imagine if snails were the size of cows

idk did you ever see blue planet 2

enemies can steal your loot

can squid evolve into crab

Horrific creature. We should nuke every square mile of the deep so the world will finally be rid of every ungodly monster that lurks in the dark reaches of the ocean.

I'm still so pissed the Endless Ocean reboot was garbage.

Radioactive kaiju claws typed this post

Very true.
Even though a videogame where you were simply a bird that flew around would make a gajillion dollars.

they're cute, don't be mean

objective: survive

I've always wanted that since I was a child. A 3D platformer with permaflight featuring a bird. It never happened and now it's too late. Pajeet doesn't know how to animate a bird.

A bird game where you play different campaigns which are just different bird species. You could be a seagull and catch fish. You could be an eagle and have the ability to zoom in really far and can attack NPC birds. You can be a little swallow and have to avoid hawks and owls. Bird of paradise dancing mini game.

Enemies can be bribed

MINE! *wheezes away*

game has fish

based pokemon what the fuck is it?

It's called a bhop squid

Imagine how satisfying it would feel to crush this in your clenched fist

the guy is probably killing the fish. Because they are cold blooded human temperature is probably like burning temperature to them.

then why does fish keep returning? is it suicidal? wow hes just like me fr fr

attracted by the light

zoo tycoon 1

zoo tycoon 2

planet zoo

Here you go

lemon slice

6/10 flavor at best

blackberry fishe

game has unwinnable fight

This kills the crab

antisemite

doesn't fallout have a dog?

never would have guessed the bite force on that motherfucker, wtf

game has a dodge button

is that a qbert enemy? what kind of walk cycle is that?

What the fuck

how are cats so fast and have such reflexes?
like why can't we have evolved to be this fast too?

gluttony
avarice

LOOK AT THIS FOOL

HA-HAYAI

do nothing but move around in weird ways and tempt fate instead of sitting around and you can be fast too.

holy shit its that nigga from metroid fusion

are you retarded?

What if it was the actual size of a condom and it tried to suck up your energy through your dick but you were too big so the most it could do was make you sleepy after like an hour but it also had the side effect of making you cum non-stop so in that hour you filled it with enough cum to inflate it like a balloon.

Nah I don't believe this is real. This doesn't look like anything. It's proabably another fake and gay söyence thing like space.

THEY WUZ PREDATORZ N SHIEEET

me on my way to the mall

We already have spiders of that size
And crabs who are way bigger than all of that

Your brain is too big so the neurons have to travel a LOOONG way to react, the cat is like 1/5 of your size so its much faster

fish never had to spend time evolving to go on land so they're just incredibly optimized singular body parts. this guy is the mouth of the fish power ranger fusion man. imagine a guy who surgically replaces the lower half of his jaw with this fish, replaces his stomach a pufferfish, etc, he'd be stronger than ever before

We should nuke every square mile of

Of africa, middle east, china and india

They look ill
I've seen this shit in bloodborne

Reminder that snails scrape their food into their mouths with a toothy tongue called a radula.

radula

Sounds rad

Hi, I need to know what these are called.

Fish

game copies mechanics from an unrelated genre

what the fuck is this thing

they are smart enough that it makes me wonder if they do shit like this just to fuck with us.

I do the same with a spatula haha

the mustache ghost. tell him he looks spiffing or he will haunt you

serious vidya question: what real-life animals are genuinely underutilized in video games?

for me, it's venomous monkeys. the idea seems like such a perfect fit for an enemy in a fantasy game or something, even though it's 100% real.

He survived

Platypii. I've never seen them in any games except zoo sims.

Dragon Quest has them

That's definitely not a platypus.

Badgers. The only example I can think of is my nigga Bumper from Diddy Kong Racing.

Why did it take so long for them to evolve into fishe

Damn, nigga

british fish

Hello

Would you?

This fish is mewing

I keep forgetting these goofy looking fuckers could bit straight through human bone if they wanted.

A ghost leviathan from Subnautica.

chadimals

stay.

need to make babies with this creature

Transhfish

Animals aren't real.

a slug that evolved the same bodyplan as a fish and can swim like them

colossal squid finally captured on tape

its a baby colossal squid so it just looks like a normal sized squid

It wasn't necessary for us to evolve that way. It was for cattes. Hyperfast reflexes provide huge benefits for a smoll ambush predator like cats. Going beyond what we have didn't provide much benefit to us because our other characteristics already made us OP.

Cat's have these huge whiskers for a reason

Do you even know what whiskers do, lol?
How are they connected to "reflexes"?

Not that guy but I have long wiry hair that works like an antennae/sensor for things around my head, id imagine he was trying to imply the hairs help detect things about to hit the cat but they'd have to be really close

I have long wiry hair that works like an antennae/sensor for things around my head

Same, but it's on my ass. It mostly detects homosexuals who try to violate my rectum so it's like spider-sense so I can always dodge dicks aimed at my anus

yo lil donnie

Slug that looks like a fish

Green slug that can make Photosynthesis

Slug with skin and shell made of literal iron

What the fuck is their problem?

What the fuck is wrong with me

You are a furry

I hate the deep sea

your brain is fuckin weird

Do these things ever get cuts in their mouths from eating shells or someshit, can't be too comfortable.

She looks like she fucks human men

Camels have skin in their mouths that's much thicker than the skin on your soles so they can eat dry, spiky plants. I imagine this fish has something similar

she

That's a male

Cassowaries.

What do the females look like? I can't imagine squids having radical sexual dimorphism

Agreed

Would let her rip my testicles to fertilize her eggs.

There's monkeys that spit/throw poison in afterimage. Might be inspired by them.

Don't forget about the slug with a built-in harpoon

That cool slug also mixes a unique venom for each harpoon iirc.

game makes snarky remarks when you play for too long or late in the night

do animal crossing games still shame players that are on late in the night?

The only one that comes to mind is the main villain from the Ty the Tasmanian Tiger trilogy

Some extinct animals are really scare, like the Dinopithecus(Terrible-Ape)

game has stealth sections

enemies take more damage when theyre unaware

Imagine how satisfying it would be to jam your finger into its mouth and see how far through you could get

game has a horde/survival mode

It wants a kiss.

enemies can be ambushed by other enemies

game has an annoying animal mascot character

everyone fucking loves it for some odd reason

lmao

Jerboa.

Enemies can score unexpected critical hits

enemies can siphon your hp

animals used to be 2 to 5 times as large as now

our ancestors still conquered them with sticks and stones

Really puts into perspective how OP critical thinking combined with the ability to create and use tools is.

maybe he'll go away after a while? eh, whatever

tranimals

Wokeslop thread

if only you knew how bad things really are

hunting in coordinated packs is also a major part of it. same reason wolves are so successful and able to take down prey much larger than they are

Hey

Fish are friends, not food.

it's a dumbo octopus, I'm trying to find the sauce of that footage ;_;