Mariobros

I hope the zelda movie takes note!

most unfaithful adaptation

generic slop story

jack black naming minecraft things turns out to be a giant meme phenomenon with gen alpha

get ready for the same shit with bowser in mario 2

It's unironically funnier and better written the the Mario movie.
But it's also a lot uglier.

I hope the zelda movie takes note!

what's that supposed to mean? Hiring Jack Black as Link and Momoa as Zelda?

THIS... IS A HOOKSHOT

This movie made me wish I had a sistermom growing up...

Starring old man Link, from the Reddit idea threads

but it's jack black playing him

Jason Momoa is Ganondorf but he's a good guy who just hangs out

The mario movie is barely even a movie. Won't see the minecraft movie, but I wouldn't be surprised if you were right.

This movie was genuinely fun to watch. The entire audience was exploudind when jack black said meme shit.
I felt like a kid again

I knkw right, shes so fucking hot

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No have the sister from this be link.

Are enderman mind raping you supposed to be an established lore thing?

Johnny Depp as Link.
Scarlett Johanson as Zelda.

Jack Black as Ganon.

what about a kiss for luck?

you gotta be snooding me

Funny you mention that because yesterday the Minecraft Movie 2 was announced for April 5, 2027. Which is like 1 week after the Zelda movie is supposed to release.

Zoomers and Gen Alpha don't care about Mario as much as they do Minecraft. It's a legacy IP to them like Mickey Mouse in the 90s and 00s

Jack Black will play Link.

This. Mario is old hat, they're only interested in fresh new IPs like Sonic the Hedgehog.

mariofag deflecting to another franchise

pottery

this would've been kino 20 years ago

Arnold Schwarzenegger as Ganon
Ryan Gosling as Link
Emma Watson as Zelda
a 40 pound animatronic onahole for Midna

so where's the go woke go broke crowd now?

Movie is not woke

take the most popular video game in the world, created by a literal nazi skinhead

HEH THIS PROVES PEOPLE LOVE POZZED SHIT

now let's see how your original IPs perform...
OH NONONONONONO

It's nice to see a movie about a children's franchise actually being for The Youth and not 30-something man children.

Try not being a retard for 5 minutes. You might like it.

gets btfo by facts and logic

R-R-RETARD

lmao you lost
kys

Why do zoomer and gen alpha like Minecraft so much anyway? It's like their entire digital lives revolve around it and roblox.

well, duh.
No one thought this would flop - its shit, but most people went to see it before knowing it was shit / are too young to care.

Oh right, the movie is a success, so it's now not woke, despite you people parroting it for months prior

Most unfaithful adaption

The movie is shit, but what would've been a faithful adaption? What is the plot to Minecraft?

Same reason why Boomers love Donkey Kong and Pac-Man besides it being the only video games they recognize
And the reason why Gen X and Milleninnals love GTA

They grew up with it. It's as simple as that.

I would laugh my ass off if she was Malon or some other Zelda girl in the movie.

jack black says [thing from Minecraft]

zoomers lose their shit

i have entered the out of touch zone because i do not get it

My Gen Alpha little cousin doesn’t explore multiple franchises like we did. I think it was a social experience for us to discuss/trade different games and try a lot of stuff. For him, all he talks about is:

Fortnite

Rocket League

Minecraft

Roblox

He got a PS5 this past Christmas and literally that’s all he plays. I showed him Legends Arceus and it he disliked “how complicated the game seems.”

We all get old eventually.

It's the combination of

Jack Black just being genuinely hilarious. Not even in ways he tries to, he's just one of those people that could do anything and it'd be funny

Game that you know from childhood

You mean tingle

It varies. My gen Alpha cousin has a Switch and basically became a tendie who also plays a lot of mobile games on his iPad. But that's because he got into it by watching Chuggaconroy on Youtube and also playing the Switch with me a few times when he was younger.

PAY ATTENTION TO THIS ANON, NINTENDO

Couldn’t even last 1 minute.

I feel for the parents who have to watch this shit and realize during the film that their children might be retarded.

I don't care.

What’s woke about it? The black lady? She has like ten lines and almost no screen time. Full man sandwich? Its just a gag. I saw it and that’s all I can think of.

Heard some kid earlier in town going "I am Steve!" over and over lmao. But kids are kids so who am I to judge them for enjoying things for kids eh?

what if we put things from the video game in our video game movie

This is an astounding revelation to the suits at hollywood. There is basically 0 OC jewish shit in this movie once the characters enter minecraft.

they took the biggest selling game of all time that is cocaine for kids and kids went to go see it

u mad chuds?

Mario Movie is just non-stop Peach girl bossing it up

Luigi doesn't even exist

Minecraft movie is almost entirely Steve

He says Minecraft things

Who could have possibly seen it coming?

Why would I care which kid's movie sells more tickets

The entire fucking movie you braindead retard. All the males are either scrawny losers or pathetic manchildren. The protogonist wins through the power of la creatividad, which is actually just mechanics from a video game marketed toward children. The female characters are ugly and dysgenic but are still shown competently fighting off monsters. Thats aside from the script consisting of 90% brainrot, which is a conditioning technique to subconsciously indel the more sinister elements into the viewers subconscious. Anon Babblegroids are all normified subhumans.

Non reply

Kek

Would let her get stuck in the washing machine/10

Notch is a chud, like us. This is a certified chud movie.

Everyone clutching their pearls over this is the saddest and most annoying shit. Let the idiot children enjoy things, like fuck. We already know they are useless and retarded. If they can't be intelligent and skilled at least they can be entertaining and they are succeeding at that. I guarantee everyone bitching and moaning about teenagers acting like teenagers are miserable useless eaters.

but they are just regurgitating and falling for a tiktok marketing campaign

Bitch, your entire mental landscape is astroturfed by the media you consume. All net traffic being consolidated to a small handful of ghettos has killed all diversity of thought and streamlined propaganda intake. The only fucking difference between the retard children and yourself is that tiktok is making money off of conditioning them into experiencing real joy while you are making money for someone else by being conditioned to experience real misery, anger, and discontent because that is the content you engage with.

This post is a sterling example of brainrot

Box office aside, it was more enjoyable overall than the Mario movie

You aren't as smart as you think you are.

Chicken Jockey

Jack black stumbling upon this new world and the slow improvement from retard living in a dirt house to a full blown survivor that accidentally discovers nether and end and slays the end dragon
Not marrying villagers subplot wtf

Its just Marvel writing in non super hero movies

Say obvious reference

Hah, get it? Its minecraft so he said minecraft thing!

Say retarded reference

Ingame jokes these writes are soo in touch

Say le obscure reference

OMG I AM A SUPER FAN I GET IT

i just came to a horrnifying realization
there's going to be a bunch of kids who saw this movie and have their sexual awakening be the villager human romance.
Not like there weren't quite an amount of them making villager porn anyway, but here we have a practically word of god confirmation of an interspecies compatability, opening the floodgates like how sonic or disney did.

You care enough to reply

The best part is that you could copy a good 90% of the CD dialogues and pass them as a Minecraft-like script and get it approved

Why nintendo never made a pokemon movie? I mean real pokemon, not shitty spin-off like that pikachu cop

Not the plot but the world. Not only is it needlessly realistic, those aren't real blocks. They just made anything cube shaped, but it completely clashes with Minecraft's look

Entire point is cool looking fantasy creatures

Why not real

Pokemon fans everyone

esl retard

Minecraft movie 2 is def happening lol

Zelda movie is live action but 90% of the movie is CGI anyways

Plot is an isekai, again

Link, played by an obese comedian, bumps into the main group from our world randomly

I…am Link!!

Link now has to teach the people from the outside world about the Zelda universe including the most basic fucking things like how to shoot a fucking bow

Zelda is played by Amy Schumer and Ganon is played by Kevin Heart

It's already been announced for 5 April 2027, which is 1 week after the Zelda movie is supposed to release

Zendaya as Zelda.

How is this compared to Sonic 3?

Play sonic 3
Michael Jackson made some good music for it

Isn't the opening 99% carried by the popularity of the brand and people thinking the concept is interesting/the movie is a complete meme like the barbie/oppenheimer thing?

Make a faithful adaptation of Minecraft

It's just Castaway

That one segment in Castaway where the dude went to hell and fought a dragon

Yeah... Fantasy Castaway