Release date is confirmed, and it's not far. Why do we have ZERO information on the cast though...

live action

It's fucked, pack it up and go home.

You do know that Miyamoto is involved right?

More stunt casting I bet

I asked ChatGPT to do this.

(Black screen. A deep, overly serious narrator voice begins...)

Narrator (dead serious):
“In a world torn apart by darkness…”

(Thunder cracks. Epic shots of Hyrule Castle crumbling. Guardians stomping through fields. A sinister Ganon-shaped silhouette looms.)

Narrator:
“One hero will rise…”

(Dramatic pause. Cut to JACK BLACK, in full green tunic and ridiculous blonde wig, staring wide-eyed at a cucco pecking his leg.)

Jack Black (as Link, screaming):
“AHHHH! Get it off me! Somebody get this feathered demon OFF ME!!”

(Cue overly-epic music that suddenly cuts into a chaotic Jack Black musical riff on an ocarina — he's playing off-key intensely.)

Title card:
“From the studio that brought you The Minecraft Movie…”

(Scene: Link stands on a cliff overlooking Hyrule. Behind him, Navi — voiced by Awkwafina — buzzes around.)

Navi:
“Hey! Listen! No seriously, LISTEN. You left your sword at the inn again.”

Jack Black (out of breath, holding a wooden spoon):
“I KNEW this felt weird in battle…”

Narrator (still trying to sound epic):
“This summer… destiny isn’t chosen…”

Jack Black (slips on a rupee, falls face-first into a Deku scrub):
“…It’s tripped over.”

Ganondorf (dryly):
“This… is the Hero of Time?”

Jack Black (giving finger guns):
“Yup. And I’m all outta time, baby.”

(Big final shot: Jack Black charging Ganon with a frying pan.)

Narrator:
“Jack Black is… THE LEGEND OF ZELDA.”

(A beat.)

Jack Black (to the camera, in full Link costume):
*“Wait, shouldn’t this be called The Legend of Link? I’m doing all the work here!”

(Logo slams on screen with a kazoo version of the Zelda theme.)
COMING SOON.

That's a man. Why do you want a man to play the role of Princess Zelda?

His pp gets hard when he demoralises people.

It literally looks exactly like her though? If you're gonna be mad, shouldn't you be mad at Aonuma for designing Zelda like that?

The only reason they want him to play Zelda is because it would own da choooods, I don't know why they keep fighting a culture war they lost a long time ago.

Zelda doesn't have a man-jaw

It's impossible to have 2 white people as the main characters anymore, so yeah, probably.

epic orchestral choir swells dramatically
IN A WORLD RULED BY DARKNESS…
A HERO WILL RISE
choir hits a huge crescendo
THIS… IS NOT THAT HERO
music scratches to a halt, cucco scream
WHO LET THE CUCCOS OUT
Jack Black bursts through a wall in full green tunic, holding a baguette instead of the Master Sword
"IT’S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE, BABYYY!"
starts doing air-flute with an ocarina
pan to sweeping Hyrule field, dramatic slow-mo shot of JB riding a horse backwards
GET READY FOR THE MOST LEGENDARY LEGEND… OF ZELDA
cut to JB getting absolutely bodied by a Moblin
WHO LET THE CUCCOS OUT
Ganon (voiced by Danny DeVito): “Give me the Triforce, ya pointy-eared punk!”
WHO WHO WHO WHO WHO
Emma Stone: “He’s the Hero of Time…”
cut to JB falling off a ledge with a Wilhelm scream
"...just not great with heights."
With Helen Mirren as Impa
Pedro Pascal as Tingle
And Chris Pratt as the voice of Navi
Chris Pratt’s voice: “Hey! LISTEN! No seriously. LISTEN.”
JB throws Navi into Lake Hylia
WHO LET THE CUCCOS OUT
montage of Jack Black doing sidequests: fishing, breakdancing for rupees, chasing chickens
serious trailer voice
JACK BLACK IS…
shot of JB dramatically opening a chest, only to find… a sandwich
“OHHH YEAH, BABY, THAT’S A HEART CONTAINER WITH MAYO”
cut to final boss fight: Ganon charging up a death beam
JB (panting): “Wait... wait... timeout... I gotta equip my... my emotional support fairy.”
pulls out plush fairy, hugs it, instantly regains full health
Ganon: “...What the hell.”
JB backflips over him in slow-mo, smacking him with a frying pan
WHO WHO WHO WHO WHO
music hits insane final chorus
WHO LET THE CUCCOS OUT
THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: CUCCO CHAOS – COMING SOON
final shot: JB wearing a full chicken suit, screaming
“THIS AIN’T EVEN MY FINAL FORM!”
fade to black

HYAAHT ITSA ME, LINK!

That would actually be the funniest shit, imagine the look on the tendies faces

No Zelda Eva Green no watch

I never realized how well AI can do these. I told it to do a Terraria one and it's amazing.

(Black screen. Gentle, ambient 8-bit music begins. Then — BOOM — a meteor crashes into the earth. Smash cut.)

Narrator (gritty, apocalyptic voice):
“In a world made of blocks… where every tree can be chopped… and every slime wants you dead…”

(Slow pan across a pixelated meadow. Suddenly, the screen explodes in dirt particles as a worm bursts from the ground.)

Narrator:
“…One man will dig deep, build higher… and absolutely ruin your lawn.”

Cue: JACK BLACK. Shirtless. In copper armor. Holding a wooden pickaxe like it's Excalibur.

Jack Black (screaming into the sky):
“WHY ARE THE ZOMBIES GETTING SMARTER?!!”

Title card: “From the studio that brought you The Minecraft Movie…”

(Cut to Jack Black building a house. It looks like a wobbly shoebox. A Guide NPC — played by Paul Rudd — watches awkwardly.)

Guide (deadpan):
“You forgot walls. Again.”

Jack Black:
“Walls are a social construct, man!”

A blood moon rises. Jack Black opens the door… zombies pour in.

Jack Black (in horror):
“…Why did I open the door? Why did I OPEN THE DOOR?!”

Narrator:
“He’ll craft. He’ll slash. He’ll scream a lot…”

(Cut to Jack Black running from a goblin army.)

Jack Black:
“I REGRET EVERYTHING!”

Florence Pugh as the Dryad (very serious):
“The corruption is spreading. Only the Chosen One can stop it.”

Jack Black (eating a mushroom mid-conversation):
“That’s cool. Also, I can’t feel my face.”

Pedro Pascal as the Arms Dealer, casually cleaning a gun:
“Welcome to Hardmode, baby.”

Final shot: Jack Black falling into lava.

Jack Black (mid-fall):
“Tell my crafting bench… I loved her…”

LOGO SLAM: TERRARIA: THE MOVIE
(8-bit rock cover of Jack Black screaming the word “TERRARIAAA!”)

It would be so unexpected that Christ Pratt or Jack Black are the protagonist in a children's movie, I wouldn't believe it.

Jack is too fat to be Link, Chris though, he might have a shot.

Is there any chance they don't use the 3 or 4 Hollywood actors of every single time in this movie? Like who the fuck could play Link other than Tom Holland or Timothée Chalamet?
If the movie is not meant to be serious then Jack Black also has a serious chance lmao.

Paul Rudd as Guide

Pedro Pascal as Arms Dealer

I hate these casting choices far less than I care to admit.

If not serious Tom Cruise would be perfect. Down to being a manlet.

ChinkGPT would do it funnier.

Here is a leaked screen from the movie, it's Link and the King of Hyrule.

Literally nobody wanted this shit to be live action.

We could have had 2D or 3D animated Zelda movie. I hope this shit bombs even as a Nintendo fan because fuck live action.

Danny Devito as guide

Keanu Reaves as Goblin Tinkerer

I don't know what to say.

There's probably someone on the team thinking they're gonna make the new Lord of the Rings, but with niggers and trannies.

First we YAH
Then we HIYAH

We could have had 2D or 3D animated Zelda movie

How would that be different from the in-game cutscenes we have currently, now that they're voice acted?

2 blonde, blue-eyed Europeans defeating the evil, hook-nosed, brown middle eastern DEMON KING

Tears of the Kingdom got away with it but I'm not sure a live action movie will. Guarantee Ganondorf is going to be generic looking or just big Pig Ganon.

they're getting too old

I CASED OVER THE MOON.

It wouldn't and it shouldn't, just like CGI RE movies.

theyre gonna get that tranny from Euphoria to play Zelda, arent they?

They don't have any other actors anon, using literally whos is apparently illegal.

In the Nintendo Today app, the company announced that the upcoming live-action The Legend of Zelda film will be released on March 26, 2027. While details of the film's release are light – and the post on Nintendo Today certainly did not elaborate much – it does say that the March 26, 2027 release date will be worldwide, suggesting all regions will get the film at roughly the same time.

OP, why are you trying so hard to drive clicks to Newsweek, when its just blogspam covering what someone else released? At least say the date in the title so we don't have to load that horrible page full of trackers.

Realistically, who can play her? I can't think of a single actress that has the right look

If he had any good sense he'd stop Aonuma.

No one, this is an irredeemably bad idea.

Stabbing...... Ocktotoks!

It should really be animated

I hate this. It's so dreadful I can't even laugh at the jokes.

You all know exactly who's gonna play her lmao