Elder Scrolls

By the way... do you happen to know what the fine is here in Cyrodiil for necrophilia? Just asking.

die

have random mommy elf reserect you as an undead servant for strange activities.

dont mind.

???

profit.

Don't have a mind

ftfy

*fuck off magic*

what if you did and just had no control.

As long as I'm not Uncle Leo.

Reminder that your character is supposed to be a complete lorelet who doesn’t know the most basic shit about anything historical or current in Tamriel EXCEPT what the fine for a multiple-time necrophilia offense is.

Your character begins in prison for a very obvious reason.

Why did they redesign all the characters to be unrecognisable rather than just making them look better?

Oblivion is an affront to the Dunmer race and why that is the only TES i won't play, and actively despise.
whole game made by vile argonians or some shit.

Oblivion Remastered is so ugly...

Lol holy shit. Anybody that has immersed in this game are now closeted necrophiliacs

Uriel Septims final visions are you violently fucking the zombies in the abandoned tunnels

I wonder how many people interacted with the bodies of characters or monsters they have killed to get a better look at their groin.

Well, it pisses me off that they put shorts on the zombies in the remaster.

Only certain magic using gems can capture a soul and make it feel. One of the daedric weapons implies that while you're using other people's souls to power the weapon it tortures them while new victims have their souls transferred to gems also get tortured if killed by the weapon.

You can thank their DEI department for that.

Explain how that statement made sense in your head.

Umbra?

They had to cover up those axe wounds.. could make certain "people" upset about their current situation.

why does this thing look like a troon
like a man with a shitty wig
don't tell me this thing is supposed to be female

You stare at zombie genitalia in videogames?

Honestly not gonna lie that line gave me a boner. Love me degenerate women

No I just spend too much time on Anon Babble dealing with before and after photos of zombies with and without shorts (because it is a problem?) So I made my own mind about why it was a thing.. axe wound.. super simple. Never even cared to notice back in the day.

Object interaction was added specifically because Todd wanted to see all the groins

Todd may be a bit strange.

gave me a boner

pick up an apple that fell on the floor to put it back on the table

suddenly have 362 items stolen and the guards arrest me

it never even went in my inventory

Is this the 2006 jank that I missed out on

The thefts were reported and documented and the information was distributed to every guard in every town by the imperial battlemages at the arcane university.

damn the remaster is ugly as shit

The absolute state of the House Hlaalu

remaster makes all the zombies wear pants

even Lucian after they were done playing doctor with him

Todd may be a bit strange.

Pretty Kitty going commando in a test cell might have something to do with that.

she was cuter in the original for oblivion potato heads

i like that they gave dark elf girls in the remaster the same voice actress as astrid in skyrim. it sounds about right, a haughty elf accent but rougher and more sinister. it sounds like she's doing a cross between skyrim neloth's accent and the generic dark elf female in skyrim's accent

knows the exact amount required to be paid for a first offender

multiple offenses leads to imprisonment

drop him into the one place where multiple people will die on their way out

The Nine like to do a bit of trolling

This is why no one helped you when Vivec slipped

based

fuck the empire
fuck imperials and fuck uppity farm equipment

uh, Falanukeks? Why is Cyrodil so bigoted?

Why should I have to pay to fuck my wife?

Everyone was but the gilfs. Pajeets read we love hags and that's what they gave us in the remake. Grey haired foxes!

Oblivion is an affront to the Dunmer race and why that is the only TES i won't play, and actively despise.

Good spine yourself dungmer shit

sorry chud, she's my wife now

You know after she became an undead she is less frigid than before.

Please explian for us simple Skyrim fans?

Resdayn would never suffer an oblivion crisis because half of oblivion is already roaming around Resdayn or contracted to dunmer wizards

I thought the soul went to the Soul Carin and their power was transferred to the weapon?

After Oblivion, Vivec disappears because he's a daedra infused cunt. The rock above the city falls, the mountain explodes, The now super saiyan Argonians decide to invade, and its very likely its all the result of Akatosh and Mehrunes Dagon's brawl. Maybe Jyggers abducted Vivec instead. We don't know for sure why he poofed, but it was right after the events of Oblivion

We don't know for sure why he poofed

because he got turned into a pair of shoes

vivec disappearing isnt the biggest issue its the fact that say azura didnt step in to save them and the whole process that went on with baar dau was stupid as fuck.
just goes to show not to trust a daedric cunt
that and you telling no powerful wizard could not just cast a slowfall spell onto the rock and then mark and recall it over the imperial city
my nwahs....red year is the most stupid piece of lore ever

soultrapped to a pair of sandals

so that your enemies can walk upon you until the end of days

looked like a potato in the original

now looks like Sminem

Tough being a Hlaalu

I do like to think Sheogorath went back to finish what he started by taking advantage of the Heart's destruction, but would that be Jyggalag, or the new Sheogorath?
Azura is a cunt too. Daedric Princes, no sense of right and wrong! Just give me a game where I'm an acolyte of Stendarr tasked with killing every Daedric Prince

God that looks like a man

spot the SHIT game that puts in some FAKE BLUEBERRY ABOMINATIONS instead of the Dunmer.

Jyggalag

Hope based Jyggy shows up in the next TES game. What's the point of introducing a new Daedric Prince and then not using them?

its okay when the tes elves look nightmarish

Everyone coming up with lore friendly reasons why Oblivion mocks the Dunmer

No you retards, its because they're blue

oops

Recommend me mods where I can rape and impregnate women in Skyrim. I want to have fun against female bandits, witches, Fosworns, etc

even...?

dont forget mares

Only if I'm drunk enough.. in game. Still low priority.

would desu

What better way of proving your dominance as a Nord gigachad then pining down and impregnating a hagraven in front of her forsworn cuck followers? Praise Kyne.

See

him

go home Maglir you're drunk already

Just imagine you're fucking the bitch from Jimmy Neutron. Carl wouldn't have any problems doing that.

all Dunmer in TES 4 Oblivion are Imperialized cucks who worship the Nine Divines and think Argonian and Khajeet rights are Human Rights. They drink wine instead of Sujama.They hate the accent of their homeland and put on a fake imperial accent to get in good graces with their Nibean and Colovian Masters. They are S'wits who think Ash Yams are too spicey.

...still no one? I'll look at another thread

Hermaphrodite false god

Crossdressing necrophiles

eat weird shit

look weird

one red year wasn't enough

degen women just have a spice that other women don't

everyone talks about her and not the cute nord smith next door

black sclera

Not a real dunmer.

tfw no hungover tall nord smith wife

They know magic and could probably teach you, are self sustaining, have their own homes and according to that one ingame quests are lonely and want a man. The only downside here is her appearance which is an easy fix with illusion magic. I would 100%

Nord

Seeing Lucien's mutilated and castrated corpse as a kid fucked me up and made me sad. I really didn't expect something like that in a game for 12+ year olds.

I really hate how much ue4ss crashes despite how many mods utilize it.

a game for 12+ year olds

It was reclassified to Mature after the gory zombie models like that were found, apparently having not been included in the rating sample, along with there being unseen nude textures in the game files.

one of the hottest npc's in the game also dies during the tutorial

What did todd mean by this?

Reminder they canonically reek.

WHY
WONT
YOU
DIIIIIEEEE

500 gold

What does she look like in the remaster? I can't find any pics on Google that aren't a black silhouette in the dark.

Always wondered why the count doesn't give a shit that a vampire is kidnapping and killing criminals in his basement given how hard he tries to keep everything under wraps. I guess she was somehow related to his wife since she screams something about feeding the lady when you fight her.

goyim he is orchestrating it for blood

And no one gives a shit that prisoners just vanish? Unless she targets out of town criminals that no one would truly miss, like that TG quest. Hmmm.... At last, I truly see.

It substantially irritates me that UESP has begun setting remastered screenshots as the default for NPC entries.

There are also human heads on pikes in Oblivion/kvatch

Dunmer girls win again

What spells u making?
So far i've only made ligma:

touch

100 damage in fire, shock, frost, health drain, magicka and fatigue

only takes about 3/4 of my magick pool.

How does it look in the remaster?

all bosmer women belong to me